Monday, April 20, 2015

Man Offers To Do Anything She Wants For $20

A woman is sitting at a bar enjoying a drink with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome man enters.

He is so striking that the woman can not take her eyes off him. The man notices her overly attentive stares and walks directly toward her.

Before she can offer her apologies for rudely staring he leans over and whispers, "I'll do anything, absolutely anything that you want me to do for $20. But only on one condition."

Flabbergasted, the woman asks what the condition is.

"You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words."

The woman considers his proposition for a moment and then removes a $20 bill from her purse, which she presses into the man's hand along with her address.

She then looks deeply into his eyes, and slowly, and meaningfully says, "Clean my house!"

Monty Python Job Interview


Marc Bolan, Elton John, Ringo Star - Children of the Revolution


Everything's Archie!


Smothers Brothers - My Old Man

Ricky Gervais - The Bible


Sunday, April 19, 2015

Eddie Izzard - Covered in bees!!


Bill Cosby - Seattle Weather & Zoo

Classic 1960s Bill Cosby standup about the Seattle weather and zoo.

Ten 1920s Slang Terms


The true nature of gorillas


Saturday, April 11, 2015

Real life enemies

Friday, April 10, 2015

Richie Kavanagh - Chicken Talk (NSFW)

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Van & Schenck - Pastafazoola / Hungry Women

Van & Schenck were a famous pair of popular singers in the early 20th century. The first song on this film was one of their biggest hits.


Saturday, March 21, 2015

Masculine Women! Feminine Men!



Irving Kaufman sings "Masculine Women, Feminine Men"

Hey, hey--women are going mad today .
Hey, hey--fellows are just as bad.
I'll say!
Go anywhere--just stand and stare.
You'll say they're "bugs" [nuts] when you
Look at the clothes they wear.

Masculine women, feminine men--
Which is the rooster?
Which is the hen?
It's hard to tell 'em apart today.
And, say, sister is busy
Learning to shave.
Brother just loves his
Permanent wave. It's hard to
Tell 'em apart today, hey, hey!

Girls were girls, and boys were boys,when I was a tot.
Now we don't know who is who or even what's what!
Knickers and trousers, baggy and wide--
Nobody knows who's walking inside!
Those masculine women and feminine men.

Stop, look, listen, and you'll agree with me.
Things are not what they used to be, you'll see.
You say hello to Uncle Joe.
Then look again, and you find it's your Auntie Flo.
Masculine women, feminine men--
Which is the rooster? Which is the hen?
It's hard to tell 'em apart today!

Why, Auntie is smoking, rolling her own.
Uncle is always buying cologne.
It's hard to tell 'em apart today, hey, hey.

You go to give your girl a kiss in the hall,
But instead you find you're kissing her brother Paul.
Ma's got a sweater up to her chin;
Papa's got a girdle holding him in--
Those masculine women and feminine men!

Now, wifey is playing billiards and pool.
Hubby is dressing the kiddies for school.
It's hard to tell 'em apart today, hey, hey.
Since the Prince of Wales in ladies' dresses [kilts] was seen,
Now what does he intend to be--the King or the Queen?
Why, grandmother buys those tailor-made clothes;
Grandfather tries to smell like a rose.

Those masculine women and feminine men!

Friday, March 20, 2015

Fuck you, Facebook

Facebook's automated system decided to lock down my account and prompted the company to hold my account for ransom, demading I show Government-issued photo ID showing my name and birth date under the masquerade of "security" of my account.

What could I have said that was so horrible? Was it something political? Religious? Racist? Violent? Anti-corp? Nope. None of those things. It was this:

"Unfortunately, your lottery number was not in the top 2,500 therefore your application will not be placed on the waiting list."

Yep. That's what brought down Facebook's hammer on me. Quoting a form letter from a Public Housing Authority email.